Zoombombing: Turns Out Not ALL Government Meetings Are Boring
If you’ve ever been forced to sit through a long, dull meeting, be it in the corporate or government world, then you might be able to relate to folks who fall asleep during such functions. After all, it’s not easy (or fun) to listen to some committee chairman read aloud things like meeting agendas, bill language or a list of reasons why some post office in rural Arkansas should be named after a guy who donated boatloads of money to that committee chairman’s reelection campaign.
Thankfully, the world around us is changing in a way that makes meetings of all kinds more interesting — or at least more entertaining. No longer do government bureaucrats, litigants in court or members of congressional subcommittees need to fear the prospect of an hours-long hell filled with nothing but legalese, bean counter number-crunching or lengthy diatribes about some Senator’s pet passion.
What technology has come to the rescue of the modern meeting? Who knew that one day, courts and committees all over the world would find themselves struggling to figure out how to mute a porn video unexpectedly blaring the sounds of loud, energetic orgasms across their chambers? What the hell is a “Scowcroft Award”? The answers to these and other questions are at your fingertips if you scroll on and continue reading Calico’s new post: “Turns Out Not ALL Government Meetings Are Boring.”
by Calico Rudasill, Sssh.com, Indie Adult Movies
Read On…
If you’re an old fart like me, you probably remember the stories of President Ronald Reagan falling asleep in cabinet meetings. Maybe, if you’re truly a political junkie, you might even recall something called the “Scowcroft Award” –an imaginary honor cooked up by George H.W. Bush to be bestowed upon the official who “who most ostentatiously falls asleep in a meeting with the president.”
Many folks took stories like these as character flaws in officials like Reagan and Scowcroft. These government meetings are (presumably) important business; how dare they fall asleep while discussing matters of immense importance to the nation and the world?
In My Defense, They Did Keep Those Astronomy Classrooms Quite Dark
I’ve always been more sympathetic to government meeting snoozers like Reagan and Scowcroft – and not just because I was famous for falling asleep during astronomy lectures back in my college days. (And again, Dr. Tomasko, if you’re still out there somewhere, I’m sincerely sorry about that… especially if it’s true that I routinely and loudly snored during my in-lecture naps.)
I think a lot of people who don’t have experience in government, or in the corporate world where most meetings are just as dull, simply underestimate how boring these meetings often are. I mean, take this excerpt of single paragraph of text from the transcription of a recent Congressional hearing, for example:
“The Chair announces the Speaker’s further extension, pursuant to section 1(b)(2) of House Resolution 965, effective August 19, 2020, of the ‘covered period’ designated on May 20, 2020….”
For God’s sake, under 30 words in and I’m already getting drowsy!
Luckily for governments, courts and similar organizations everywhere, their meetings have the potential to be a lot more entertaining these days, thanks to the ongoing pandemic and the proliferation of videoconferencing as the dominant meeting forum and form.
If It Pleases the Court… Someone May Be Pleasing Himself in the Court
Since a lot of the people holding meetings via Zoom don’t seem to realize there are easy ways to prevent attendees from displaying undesirable content on the shared screen, ‘Zoombombing’ has become something of a common practice recently.
On the downside, this means government, judicial and corporate meetings are increasingly being hijacked by pranksters who spam the meetings with porn. On the bright side, though, this means government, judicial and corporate meetings are increasingly being hijacked by pranksters who spam the meetings with porn.
Sure, it’s really obnoxious to derail a court hearing by displaying Pornhub on screen in the court, but from a reader’s perspective, it’s still kinda hilarious to imagine some staid, self-important judge flailing at the Zoom controls trying to figure out how to get rid of the loud orgasm sounds drowning out the prosecutor. Plus, when the Zoombombed hearing itself is about someone indicted for hacking, it adds another layer of fun irony for us slack-jawed oglers.
Forgetting to Mute FTW!
The latest bit of political meeting Zoombombing of which I’ve heard tale is of a much more innocent variety. Rather than hacking or otherwise intentionally derailing the meeting in question, a pair of accidental Zoombombers in Brazil apparently simply forgot to mute themselves or turn off their video feed before taking a detour to a nearby bed. Whoops!
“As soon as we noticed what was happening, we immediately asked the people controlling the audio and video of the participants to take it off the feed,” said Leonel Brizola, who chaired the meeting. “Us councilors and other participants do not have any input in controlling or editing videos on Zoom.”
Oh, c’mon Leo – finally something potentially entertaining happens at one of these meetings and your first thought is to put a stop to it? You’re no fun.
Say what you will about Evo Morales, the former President of Bolivia; at least he knew how to spice things up a little, even in the middle of a dull, ho-hum hearing on some trifling little detail like whether his office should be subject to term limits.
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