OK, So Maybe There is SOME Sex in the Champagne Room…
When it comes to champagne and other things, some unlikely-sounding explanations are far more convincing than others, it’s safe to say. For example, the time my older brother and his friends ate an entire pound of hamburger my mom had in the fridge waiting to be used for dinner that night, then blamed it on the family dog, he might have considered instead blaming it on an animal with thumbs, so as to explain how the fridge was opened — and how the creature in question managed to use the skillet that he neglected to wash after the fact.
So, while I suppose it’s possible that the moaning noises heard and used condoms seen by undercover cops investigating a strip club in Providence were the result of purely the sort of “simulated sex” that the club owner says takes place during a lap dance, part of me is quite skeptical of that claim.
Ultimately, though, do we really care about people having sex in strip clubs, assuming it all involves consenting adults? Calico sure doesn’t — but she also understands why a city licensing board might not be able to adopt her attitude.
Read all about it in Calico’s latest post, “OK, So Maybe There is SOME Sex in the Champagne Room…”
by Calico Rudasill, Sssh.com Porn Movies For Women and Couples
There’s a theory about creativity, one which I first heard in an old PBS special featuring legendary guitarist (and excellent storyteller) Leo Kottke. I’m not sure whose theory it is, but as Kottke tells it, the theory is that all creativity starts with lying.
“There’d be no art without lies,” Kottke said (or something to that effect – cut me some slack on the precision of the quotes here; I watched this documentary close to 20 years ago).
He then went on to tell a story about being in the car with his son and daughter, when one of them “made a sound that only a child can make and only a parent can truly suffer for.”
“He poked me in the eye!” Kottke’s daughter screamed.
As Kottke turned around “to see what was left of her eye,” his son offered an explanation for what had occurred: “I didn’t know that was your face,” Kottke’s son claimed.
“And my heart swelled with pride,” Kottke said. “Because I knew I had an artist in the back seat.”
A Portrait of the Artist as a Strip Club Owner
Kottke’s story doesn’t have much to do with the rest of my post, other than that it informs my opinion that Christopher Vianello, the owner of a strip club in Providence, Rhode Island called “The Wild Zebra,” may also be an artist.
In a recent hearing before city licensing officials in Providence, Vianello was asked about reports from undercover police officers that they heard moaning coming from private “champagne cubicles” inside the club and observed a “trash can filled with used condoms.”
“There’s a lap dance happening,” Vianello said by way of explaining the moaning. “It’s a simulated sex act, and that’s part of the show.”
And the used condoms? Vianello responded that some customers wear condoms beneath their clothes when aroused.
Now, to be fair, I’ve heard tale of men wearing condoms beneath their clothes at strip clubs, including from one friend who said a customer who got a lap dance from her discarded his (clearly “used,” if you catch my drift) condom on the club floor, right next to the couch on which the dance had been performed.
Moaning while giving a lap dance, though? That’s a new one on me – and perhaps not the most convincing spin ever offered.
TBH Though… So What The Champagne?
While I do think it’s very rare for actual sex to take place in a strip club (just ask Chris Rock), it’s certainly not entirely unheard of.
None of this is to say I have a problem with people having sex inside strip clubs – so long as it’s all consensual and involves two (or more) fully willing adults, of course. It’s not legal for people to have sex in strip clubs of course, but it’s among many crimes on the books that other people can commit without raising any eyebrows on my part.
I suppose I can’t very well expect the sort of people who sit on city licensing boards to adopt my laissez faire attitude toward sex in strip clubs, but if they were to step back and really consider all the crimes which take place in Providence in any given week, how high would strip club-based prostitution really rank on the list?
So, while I’m less than convinced that Mr. Vianello’s accounting of the source of the moaning and used condoms heard and seen at his club is on the level, part of me hopes the licensing board decides to accept it and shift its focus elsewhere.
After all, it’s not like he poked someone in the eye.