Mia Khalifa – Defenses Aren't The Only Thing Baker Mayfield Reads Well

– Calico Rudasill, Sssh.com

In her time as a social media celebrity, former porn performer Mia Khalifa has embarrassed more than her fair share of athletes, pro and amateur.

I’m not going to go through the full list of the guys left red-faced by their exchanges with Khalifa, but if you Google a small set of key words like “Mia Khalifa, athlete,” you’ll find plenty of information on your own, including a helpful list of 10 Athletes Mia Khalifa Has Put On Blast For Sliding In The DM’s.

Rather than rehash all those incidents, I’d like to extend a brief golf clap in the direction of Oklahoma quarterback Baker Mayfield, who recently demonstrated he knows how to avoid more kinds of trouble than just the oncoming pass rush of the opposing team.

Take A Tip From The Humungous

From the perspective of the guys who have stumbled into her feed (and subsequently out of her good graces) I can certainly understand the temptation to engage Mia Khalifa. She’s cute, outgoing on social media platforms and clearly passionate about sports.

Once you’ve witnessed the online depantsing of several of your athletic peers, however, you’d think more jocks would hear the voice of The Humungous echoing in their skull, imploring them to “just walk away.”

That’s what Baker Mayfield did – and he even did so in a reasonably polite fashion (initially, at least; more on this point later).

“Nah,” Mayfield tweeted. “I got my girl, I’m pretty lucky to have somebody like her in my life too.”

Well done, Mr. Mayfield – and bonus points for having the sense to publicly count your blessings with respect to your girlfriend. I’m sure there are people out there in the Twitterverse picky and sensitive enough about language to take issue with the phrasing, “I got my girl,” but I’m not one of them – and more importantly, I’ll bet Baker’s girl isn’t one, either.

In Football, A Smart Quarterback Makes Good Use Of His Blockers

I’m not really a big football fan, but I’ve listened to my husband scream at the TV during games enough to have picked up a thing or two about the game and key strategies therein. Among the jargon I’ve learned along the way is the term “max protect,” which refers to the practice of employing additional players to protect the QB on passing plays.

Much like using a running back or tight end to “chip” the defensive end, only much longer-lasting and decisive, Mayfield prevented Khalifa from penetrating into his relationship backfield, so to speak, by bringing in the additional protection of a twitter-block.

To her credit, Khalifa took the blocking in stride, as her caption for the tweet linked above – “Getting curved is a part of life #boomer” – demonstrates.

Some might think blocking Khalifa was a bit harsh, but I read it another way; I think Mayfield simply decided discretion is the better part of social media valor, to put a modern twist on an old saying. Rather than continue to have a back and forth with Khalifa, one which was liable to lead his girlfriend to wonder if the continued engagement was more than just cyber self-defense regardless of how he handled the exchange, Mayfield just shut the whole thing down.

I’d offer a football analogy for this maneuver, too, but I seem to have reached the extent of my gridiron vocabulary. Plus, my husband left to do errands as I was in the middle writing that last paragraph, leaving me feeling like a head coach whose offensive coordinator left the field for an emergency bathroom break, right before the defense recovered an interception, or snatched a fumble out of midair, or whatever the appropriate verbiage may be.

Oh well, I guess it’s time to treat this post like it’s fourth and 90, and execute an onside punt (or maybe the term I’m looking for is “unfair catch”?), by wisely signing off on this post with no further ado.

Kudos, Baker Mayfield! Here’s hoping you get drafted someday by a truly great team, like the one up in the northeast – you know, the New England 76ers, or Boston Paternalists, or whatever it is they’re called.