Humor: For The Record Ma, We’re Having PLENTY Of Sex

Humor: For The Record Ma, We’re Having PLENTY Of Sex

While it’s understandable that parents want to be involved in their children’s lives, even once those children are grown adults, there is such a thing as being over-involved in your adult son’s life — and his sex life may be an area which requires a particular sensitivity.

It’s also true that when tragedy strikes, a grieving parent might be driven to do things she wouldn’t otherwise do, or try to be helpful in ways that maybe aren’t so helpful — like suggesting the reason her son committed suicide is that her daughter-in-law denied him sex, so the daughter-in-law should therefor be arrested on charges that she “abetted” the man’s suicide.

It’s the sort of sad, awful story that makes Calico very glad to be involved in a mutually fulfilling sexual relationship — and even more glad that she’s on good terms with her mother-in-law. Read all about it in Calico’s latest post, “For The Record Ma, We’re Having PLENTY Of Sex.”

by Calico Rudasill, Sex Entertainment Movies For Women

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Read on…

This is going to sound very strange coming out of the blue, but I’d just like to clarify here and now that if my husband should ever commit suicide – something I dearly, dearly hope never happens, obviously – it will NOT be because he’s sex-starved.

To be clear, this is not something I think will ever be an issue, even if we were to stop having sex. I figure that long before his sexual frustration reached the level of causing him significant mental health problems (something we’re all potentially subject to, if the frustration gets severe enough), he’d have frank conversations with me in search of ways to solve our problem. And if that didn’t work to get our sex life going again, he’d likely leave me – or maybe just cheat on me, seeing as how infrequent sex is reportedly one of the top reasons people step out on their spouses.

Here’s a Thought: Maybe Try Minding Your Own Damn Business

Thankfully, the reason this is all on my mind today has nothing to do with my husband or our sex life. It has to do with an alarming (and quite long) headline I happened across recently: “Husband kills himself because of a lack of sex – before his grieving wife is arrested when her mother-in-law accuses her of ‘abetment to suicide’ in India.”

That gem of a sensationalist journalistic mouthful comes from the Daily Mail – and the headline is only the beginning of this awful story.

As reported by the Daily Mail and the Times of India, “Geeta Parmar, 32, a resident of Maninagar in Gujarat, was taken in by police following a complaint filed by her late husband’s mother-in-law.”

In her complaint, Muli Parmar, Geeta’s mother-in-law, stated “Once I had gone inside my son’s room and found that he and my daughter-in-law were sleeping on different beds. When I asked my son about this, he told me that they did not have physical relations as Geeta had taken a vow that she would not have sleep with her husband.”

First, if I were Geeta, I don’t think I’d be particularly happy with my husband discussing our sex life (or lack thereof) with his mother. That sort of conversation sounds like the kind of thing that Norman Bates might have done before becoming an entrepreneur in the lodging industry. (Granted, in Norman’s case, it seems his mother would have been alarmed to find he was having sex at all, not that he wasn’t having enough.)

Second, how in the hell can the police act on this without knowing more about the man’s mental state? What happens if they come to find out he was clinically depressed? Does Hallmark even make a “Sorry for Arresting You and Accusing You of Driving Your Husband to Suicide Without Considering Other Possible Contributing Factors” card?

A Preemptive Reassurance (Maybe)

Since my husband and I both used to refer to our own mother as “Mom”, to avoid confusion we started calling his mother “Ma.” So, if “Mom” called to invite us to dinner while I was out, I know this means it was my mother, while if “Ma” called while I was out, I pretend not hear what he says after that.

Just kidding Ma!! (She’s actually a lovely woman with whom I get along extremely well; sometimes the temptation to joke about mothers-in-law overwhelms even the happiest of sex-bloggers, I guess.)

At any rate, even though we don’t live in India and I’m not sure the sort of complaint filed by Muli Geeta would fly here in the U.S., I still feel compelled to say it: Ma, your son and I have plenty of sex. 

Hell, we may even be having too much sex, if anything – and maybe too adventurous, as well, if the recently-sprained muscle in his back is any indication.

Hmm. You know, now that I’ve committed those words to the page, I’m suddenly not sure that hearing her son is having too much adventurous sex is truly the sort of reassurance Ma is looking for. 

Also, is there a lawyer in the house? If so, there’s no crime under U.S. law in encouraging your husband to try out a sexual position that he’s no longer flexible enough to sustain, is there? 

Don’t Despair!  Help Is On the Way – Check Out Adult Indie Films To Scratch That Itch – Click Here.

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