Man Divorces Sex Doll. Let Me Guess: When He Broke the News, Her Facial Expression Didn’t Change
There are ‘unconventional’ marriages and then there are unconventional marriages. The former is represented by, say, a decision to see other people o the side. The latter is more characterized by marrying an inanimate object, spiritual apparition, or member of the Baldwin family.
In her new post, Calico checks in on the latest news involving her favorite Kazakh bodybuilder, Yuri sex chicken, who isn’t Calico’s favorite Kazakh bodybuilder simply because he’s the only Kazakh bodybuilder of whom Calicoo is aware — he’s also the only Kazakh bodybuilder who happens to be married to sex doll. (We think?)
Sadly, it turns out all is not well in the marriage between Yuri and his beloved Margo — and things began to turn sour just a few short weeks after they tied the knot back in late 2019.
What has gone wrong between Yuri and Margo? What can go wrong in a marriage between a bodybuilder and a sex doll? Who the hell fantasizes about giant hermaphroditic chickens? Am I still asking questions about the same post I was writing about three sentences ago?
Find out, somehow, in Calico’s latest post: “Let Me Guess: When He Broke the News, Her Facial Expression Didn’t Change.”
– Calico Rudasill, Sssh.com Award-Winning Erotic Movies
There are many different unconventional marriage options out there for people to explore in this great big world of ours. There’s ‘unconventional’ in the sense of the relationship between the betrothed being open and non-monogamous, there’s ‘unconventional’ in the sense that you’re committed and monogamous but live separately and ‘unconventional’ in the sense that you’re married to a pirate ghost.
Sometimes, even the most unconventional marriage or relationship can fall prey to the most conventional of problems, like jealousy, or infidelity, or concern that your ghostly fiancé has developed a substance abuse problem after falling in with the wrong spirit=crowd while on holiday in Thailand.
Don’t Feel Too Bad; The Honeymoon Never Lasts
I have written before about the man at the center of today’s post, the Kazakh bodybuilder Yuri Tolochko. He came to my attention a little over a year ago when I read about the various challenges involved in his relationship with Margo, his sex doll bride.
You might expect Yuri to be crushed (albeit not as literally as Margo), but you know the old saying: The doll-marrying Kazakh bodybuilding show must go on. While he says he still loves Margo, Yuri is reticent to resume their sexual relationship.
“I don’t want Margo to break down again,” Yuri explained. “And that means I have to unload her.”
“Unload” her? I don’t want to accuse Yuri of being somewhat unsentimental or anything, but there must be a kinder way to put this. Maybe it’s just a language barrier thing?
“I decided that I could have several wives, this tradition exists in some eastern cultures,” Yuri continued. ““I am currently considering two options. I got acquainted online with another sex doll.”
Yeah, OK – it was not a language barrier thing; Yuri is a heartless prick.
Boy, Have I Got a Sales Lead for All You Sex-Chicken Manufacturers!
The good (?) news is that because Yuri is an unconventional guy who’s clearly very willing to try new things, his options for his unilaterally declared open relationship with Margo go well beyond meeting other sex dolls.
“He is keen to sexually experiment with a ‘big chicken’,” The Mirror reports, “albeit not a live one.”
So, then… he wants to experiment sexually with a dead chicken?
“It will be such a sex toy,” Yuri explains (much to my relief). “He will have a vagina and a d**k. I can’t wait for her.”
I can’t be sure, because of the Mirror’s self-censorship, but I think the quote above indicates that Yuri is on the lookout for a massive sex toy shaped like a chicken that has both male and female sex organs. Either that, or the giant, chicken-shaped sex toy will come with a friend shaped like duck.
Regardless, this story truly can’t get any stranger now… Right?
Plot Twist: The Story Gets Even Stranger
“Last month, Yuri shared a video of himself stroking and tearing flesh off a chicken to achieve autonomous sensory meridian response – a tingling sensation that can produce sexual pleasure,” the Mirror adds.
Hmm… Suddenly, I’m no longer certain the enormous, hermaphroditic chicken Yuri is fantasizing about is a toy, rather than a literal enormous, hermaphroditic chicken.
“After my sex with chicken meat, I really wanted to have such a toy and take care of it,” Yuri says.
You know, at this point, I really think someone needs to ask Yuri to provide his definition of the word “toy,” because that term seems to be doing a lot of work here.
The Forgotten Bride
You know what’s conspicuous by its absence in this tale of marital woe? Margo’s perspective, of course. Leave it to the media to let the man control the conversation, am I right? I’ll bet they never even asked Margo to weigh in.
I’m willing to speculate that Margo took it all with grace and dignity – or at the very least, a stiff upper lip. After all, Yuri doesn’t strike me as the sort of guy who would faithfully follow all the cleaning and maintenance steps required to keep his wife’s skin soft and flexible.
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