By Lovely Lovely at Badoink Magazine.
Although most people who engage in kinky sex, especially one that might put their lives in danger usually do it in a way that is safe to all parties involved, that is not always the case. Sometimes in a bid to be spontaneously creative sexually, one might decide to try things one is not completely familiar or comfortable with.
Not that you should always only stick with what you know. I mean, exploring during sex is one of the nicer bits of having sex. Sometimes though certain fetishes like asphyxiation, fisting (or other types of major anal play) and bondage does require a certain measure of knowledge before venturing into. This is not something you should be trying to do after ingesting copious amounts of drugs and alcohol.
Read on…
This is when boundaries during sex comes into play. The media often like to portray people with fetishes as depraved and twisted, but serious practitioners are often the most careful. Accidents usually happen with those who don’t take boundaries seriously. So if you’re venturing into this territory, then make sure you’re doing it with a responsible partner who knows what he/she is doing. If you’re both new, then make sure you take it slow. Here are some tips for you:
Don’t be a drunk fool
There is nothing sexy about fucking when you’re so drunk you can hardly function. Sure alcohol can be a great lubricant but too much can dull the senses and it might make you miss your partners cues. Best to be sober and focused, especially when engaging in more technical sexual acts (electric shock games, asphyxiation, etc).
The same goes for drugs
I know some people like to fuck while high, but really, it’s always best to stay sharp and safe.
Safe words
Safe words are really important when playing games. Really. Because in some games “No,” or “Stop,” don’t really mean what they’re supposed to. A safe word is there to keep both of you safe so that accidents don’t happen. Make sure you pick something distinct and non-sexual so that when you say it there is no confusion about it. So that means pick something unique like, “Unicorn Fairy” or “Michelin Tyre” and not “Daddy likey!”
Make sure you can get them out quickly
Whatever you decide to do, make sure you can get them out of it fast because sometimes not being able to get them out of that bind or whatever is what causes the accidents.
And most importantly, if you partner calls out the safe word, stop immediately.
I’m not trying to rain on your sexual parade, but it’s much better to have a fun sexual experience when both parties are having fun and come out satisfied. Amiright?
What other measures do you take to safeguard your play? Let me know in the comments!
You can read more articles and commentary by Lola at Badoink Magazine…