Weird Sex Scenes in Non-Weird Movies

So, there’s plenty of weird sex in the movies, because let’s face it, there are a lot of weird movies out there. So if you decide to watch something by John Waters, for example, the filmmaker from Baltimore who is famous for his cult movies starring Divine, you pretty much know you’re going to see some raunchy, nasty and downright weird sex scenes. Or some indie European vampire flick with chainsaws and dragons. Just go ahead and expect some weirdness there.

But what about movies with weird sex scenes that you’re just not expecting? Cosmo offers a look at their pick for ten more or less mainstream movies with really weird sex scenes. Their choices include Avatar (because blue glittery beings with ponytail fetishes), Macgruber (because some guy has hilarious standing up sex with a ghost), and Bridesmaids (where Jon Hamm is a narcissistic jerk who leaves Kristen Wiig in pain from the sheer awkwardness of their couplings).

Eyes Wide Shut
Eyes Wide Shut
starring Nicole Kidman and Tom Cruise

Also they mention the ventriloquist’s dolls having sex in Bride of Chucky…but if you’re gonna go there, you have to mention the amazing epic sex scene (even better uncut) with the puppets in Team America: World Police.

Okay, creeping myself out here, gimme a minute.

Okay, whew!

So, in my last experience of watching movies, I gotta say, sometimes you just never expect the weird sex when it comes along. Especially in some middle of the road Hollywood film, where sex scenes are expected to be perfectly choreographed, beautifully lit, with not a hair out of place. And sometimes the weirdness creeps in right in the middle of those “perfect” scenes! Indiewire lists a few here that are particularly memorable, or maybe haunting is the word.

Some of these films go back a few years, and of course the I970s was a great decade for cinema so there’s a few from that whacky era. Now, everyone knows about Last Tango in Paris (it always reminds us to put butter on our shopping list), but what about Ken Russell’s film The Devils? It’s set in the 16th century, and is the true story of a priest (Oliver Reed) tried for heresy, but also focuses on a deformed nun (Vanessa Redgrave) with some really icky sexual fantasies, most of them involving religious icons.

And what about David Cronenberg’s Crash? There’s one character who likes to get hurt in car crashes and then have her wounds, uh, violated by her lover. It is hugely disturbing and one has to wonder about the mid that wanted to portray this fetish onscreen. But then, it’s Cronenberg we’re talking about. Check out his film Videodrome for some very disturbing scenes where a guy has sex with his TV set.

NextMovie also has a list of their Kinkiest Scenes Ever, including movies like Secretary (with Maggie Gyllenhaal as an emotionally-disturbed young woman who starts up a sadomasochistic relationship with her boss, played by James Spader), and Eyes Wide Shut (also on several of the lists I found), Stanley Kubrick’s final film starring Tom Cruise and Nicole Kidman (who were still married at the time) for its disturbing but erotic ritual orgy scene. Several lists also mentioned the “sex scene” in Requiem for a Dream, which is more of a degrading scene of exploitation in which Jennifer Connelly is reduced to performing a disturbing routine in front of a bunch of obnoxious Wall Street types because she’s desperate for heroin money.

I found these lists interesting because there is such a diversity of what people think of as “weird” or “kinky” or “disturbing.” Some of this stuff is hilarious; some of it is gross; and some of it is frankly sickening. But your response may depend entirely upon your own likes, dislikes, and fantasies. Seems kind of brave of these filmmakers to put their freaky stuff out there on the screen for everyone to see…because there must be just a little bit of these scenes floating around in their heads somewhere, and it’s compelling enough that they’ve found a way to explore it, expand it and imagine it for the big screen. So the rest of us can view it and feel just ever so slightly uncomfortable…

Feature Image: That Awkward Moment with Zac Efron, Miles Teller, and Michael B. Jordan

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