Survey Says Couples Having Sex Less, Talking Politics More. Coincidence?
Calico keeps hearing that people are having sex less often than they used to — not just during the pandemic, but in a trend that goes back years before Covid ever reared its ugly, spikey, viral head.
So far, the academics, scientists, therapists and self-help gurus who have looked at this trend have been unable to come to any sort of agreement on what’s behind the trend. There are some theories, lots of contributing factors that people have cited and plenty of discussion, but no Official Answer.
Calico believes she knows why nobody can come up with the Official Answer — and more to the point, she believes she knows the Official Answer, as well.
Why can’t serious thinkers come to a conclusion on the Great Sex Decline of the 21st Century? Should we ask non-serious thinkers, instead? Is there any better organization to conduct a sex-related politics survey than the Center for the Study of Elections and Democracy at Brigham Young University? Most importantly, what is the Official Answer?
Read all about it in Calico’s new post: “Survey Says Couples Having Sex Less, Talking Politics More. Coincidence?”
by Calico Rudasill, Sssh.com Sexy Original Movies For Women and Couples
Read On…
There are many reasons why a couple might start having sex less often, or not at all. Maybe you “focus on cultivating intimacy but not desire,” or maybe one of you has “pulled out of the relationship,” or maybe you found out Siri has been listening to you have sex and you’re still too freaked out by that to start getting busy with each other again, just yet.
With so many possible contributing factors at an individual level, it complicates the task of trying to figure out the larger trend we keep hearing about, one that suggests people are having sex less often, in the aggregate.
Calico to the Politics Analytical Rescue!
I believe I’ve determined the reason it’s hard for academics, researchers, journalists and the like to figure out this trend, though: They’re all being too cautious, reasonable and professional about this whole “analysis” thing they do.
Luckily, I am bound by no such constraints of professionalism, reasonableness or shame, permitting me to apply my narrow minded, uninformed, ill-considered guesswork with total confidence that my conclusion will be rock solid and downright unimpeachable (at least by the Senate as it is currently comprised).
So, it is in that spirit of intellectual laziness, ethical complacency and good old-fashioned rhetorical negligence that I offer you the following Official Answer to the question: Why are American couples having less sex?
The Official Politics Answer
Before I get to my Official Answer, a quick aside.
Why have I limited this query to American couples, you might reasonably ask? Well, because the single survey on which I’m basing my entire, quickly patched together Official Answer only asked American couples, that’s why. (Duh.)
OK, enough preamble! The Official Answer to why American couples are having less sex than they did in years past is politics… Donald Trump.
Wait, wait – hear me out!
You see, according to the American Family Survey, which is conducted by the Deseret News and the Center for the Study of Elections and Democracy at Brigham Young University, “spouses or partners talked about political or social issues more, an increase of 6 percentage points in the last year and 12 points since 2015” and “had sex less often, a 5-point drop from last year and 10 points since 2015.”
Because you are a very smart reader who has no trouble connecting the dots on your own, I could probably stop right here and just type “case closed!” or “bingo!” or “Yahtzee!” or “gesundheit!” or whatever the appropriate written form of a mic drop might be. But because I’m thorough and have nothing better to do right now, I will explain further.
Thinking About Trump Doesn’t Exactly Put Me in the Mood
Whenever one is analyzing, considering, or debating the actions of other people, it’s dangerous to project your own preferences onto them, to assume they think the same way you do, or share your beliefs. But it’s also very easy to do, so I’m just going to roll with it.
My Official Answer is premised on the following Airtight Logical Steps: (1) Whenever my husband and I talk about politics or public policy, which we really try to do only several hours before or after having sex, my mind has a tendency to go into free association mode; and (2) I did just concede that I’m projecting my own tendencies on to the survey respondents, so Airtight Logical Step (2) really shouldn’t be necessary here.
In my marriage, one moment, we’re talking about the pros and cons of some arcane environmental politics regulation, the next I’m thinking about Andrew Wheeler – and from there it’s just a hop, skip and a synapse-spark away to this creepy fucking picture of the two of them at a press conference and it takes at least six hours for the chills to stop running straight down my spine and into my churning stomach.
That same dynamic exists for just about every political issue and division of American government, by the way, in part because there’s actually quite a lot of pictures of Trump looking oddly at his underlings, or vice versa.
So, there you have it, folks: The Official Reason American couples are having less sex is Donald Trump. This shall remain the Official Answer until the end of his presidency – or at least until I read another survey or have occasion to watch a particularly on-point episode of “Family Feud.”