[Today Calico examines pro wrestling legend Ric Flair’s claim he has slept with 10,000 women in his life. Calico runs the numbers, draws on her personal experience with male sexual exaggerations, mines the wisdom of Ron Jeremy and says there’s only one thing of which we can be sure: Flair’s orgasm was accompanied by a very familiar expression of his personal satisfaction.]
Sex, Lies And Professional Athletes
– Calico Rudasill, Sssh.com
Throughout my youth, and especially during my college years, most of my closest friends were male. This wasn’t due to any conscious choice I made; it just worked out that way, possibly because many of the subjects I studied at university tended to draw a largely male crowd (and/or discouraged women to participate, depending on who you talk to about those fields).
As a function of all these friendships with young men, I gradually became part of an inner circle of sorts with some of them, meaning they came to feel comfortable enough around me to crack jokes, tell stories and make claims of the sort men usually don’t in “mixed company.”
One of the most interesting categories of male conversation I was introduced to through these friendships was the Ludicrously Exaggerated Sexual Claim genre, a tradition by which men enhance tales of their sexual prowess and conquests in completely absurd, unbelievable fashion, but which they also seem to expect listeners to believe.
I’ve been thinking about some of those conversations a lot the last couple days, after hearing about pro wrestling legend Ric Flair’s claim of having sex with 10,000 women in his life.
I’m not saying Ric is lying; I’m just saying if he’s telling the truth, he’s been a very busy man.
Ron Says It’s Bullshit – And Ron Certainly Knows About Having Lots Of Sex
I’m not the only one who’s skeptical of Flair’s 10,000 women claim; so is the world’s most recognizable male porn star, Ron Jeremy.
“If you do the math, if you start having sex at the age of 14 up to the age of 68, and he still has to go to school, eat, sleep… Every second of the day, he’d have to be going like this,” Jeremy said, making a humping motion with his hips.
Jeremy is wrong about the math, but I still share his incredulity at Flair’s claim. In truth, having sex with 10,000 different people could be accomplished by having sex with just one person a day for a little over 27 years – but I’m guessing if he were to be thoroughly cross-examined on the question, even Flair himself would have to concede he didn’t go 27 years having sex with a different woman each day.
As I’m sure Jeremy can attest, there are physical costs to having sex day after day, and even a pro wrestler’s back would need the occasional day off from fucking – especially if someone had recently whacked it with a folding chair.
In Ric’s Defense, His Number Is Only Half As Ridiculous As Wilt’s
As noted by Ron, Ric Flair isn’t the first famous guy to make an eyebrow-raising claim about the number of women he’s had sex with. NBA great Wilt Chamberlain once made a claim exactly twice as big as Flair’s.
Nobody believed Chamberlain either, in part because to reach 20,000 women by the time he published the sum of 20,000 (at age 55), Wilt would need to have averaged 1.4 sexual encounters a day since he was 15. Again, this is technically not impossible, but you must admit, it’s damn unlikely.
Chamberlain’s boast did serve one very useful purpose, however; it served as the basis for what was undoubtedly one of MC Hammer’s finest moments as a comic actor.
The Sonic Equivalent Of The “Oh Face”
While Flair may be guilty of extreme exaggeration of the macho variety, and we may never know for sure if he’s telling the truth about having sex with 10,000 women, there is one thing we can say about Flair’s sexual proclivities.
I’ve carefully examined the evidence, and the result is clear: Whatever else he may or may not have done, I’m certain I know what Flair did as he climaxed, every time.
Calico’s work has appeared under various pen names in adult industry trade journals and on several mainstream op-ed portals, including the Huffington Post.