Today's Male Escorts – The Reinvention Of The Gigolo

by Coleen Singer at

Thanks to the popularity of HBO’s Hung, Showtime’s Gigolos and the mainstream feature movie Bel Ami, there’s something very in vogue about gigolos at the moment. The male escort is no longer a sordid Ron Jeremy caricature, or teenage hustler cruising the corners and boulevards. Today’s more executive escort caters to Janes, not Johns.

Haven’t seen the film “Belle Ami”?  It’s a great one.  Check out the trailer:

In a recent Aeon magazine article, “Is the growing market for male escorts a sign of female sexual liberation or just a re-run of the same old stereotypes?”,  author Clarissa Sebag-Montefiore observes:

 In the middle of every month, when the moon is full, and straight after payday, Louise meets Tom in a smart hotel in north Sydney to indulge in what she calls ‘my little ritual’. She lays out a bottle of her favourite Champagne, a box of chocolates and a punnet of fresh strawberries, and dresses thoughtfully for their rendezvous, in a mini‑skirt or tight jeans.

Male Escort Bradley Lords
Las Vegas Escort Bradley Lords

What follows is tightly programmed: Louise is paying for Tom’s time, and for a hefty fee this smooth-talking 48-year-old escort with greying temples will wine, dine and massage her. He’ll also make love to her. Their last meeting lasted six hours. ‘We sit down, we talk, we have a drink,’ says Louise. And sex? ‘A few times.’ She giggles. ‘Three, four. I lost count.’ Tom provides relief from her humdrum career in accountancy – it’s all about her. ‘I spend practically the whole day before in the spa and the hairdresser,’ she explains coquettishly. ‘It’s fun. It’s just treating myself.’”

For a growing number of often affluent women, hiring an escort seems safer and more satisfying than casual sex with a random stranger: Tom not only has rave testimonials on his website but also uploads STD test results once every three months to show he is clean. Initially cautious, Louise had booked an appointment to discuss the health risks with her GP. The doctor reassured her that she’d heard it all before: ‘What else? A lot of my patients see escorts.’

News Alert!  In this new day and age, it’s not only okay for women to enjoy porn, but also enjoy the romantic and sexually charged company of a paid male escort.  This is a far cry from days of old when pretty much the only women hiring male escorts were filthy rich elderly women who would take a paid escort out for a night on the town for a fancy dinner and some elegant dancing  at the Tavern On The Green.  Today, the average age of women who hire male escorts is well under 50, many of whom are business executives. And, as we see in a clip from Showtime’s Gigolo, Nick Hawk discovers that his clients tastes can range from romantic to downright kinky! …

So, for any readers that are interested in exploring this pretty-darned-sexy realm, I would mainly suggest that you carefully research the male escorts in your area or city you are visiting. When considered employing the services of a male escort but don’t want any nasty surprises when you arrive, check out a site like Escorts and Babes where all photos are independently verified to ensure that what you see is what you get.  This site covers Australia only, but with a little searching on the internet, it’s pretty easy to find similar review listing sites in the United States and other countries.

In a 2011 paper, Terri Conley and colleagues at the University of Michigan found that women are no less interested in casual sex than men. But they are happier to engage if they expect the experience to be sexually satisfying and if they can remove any risk of stigma.

In his book, “What Do Women Want?: Adventures in the Science of Female Desire” (2013) the American writer Daniel Bergner argues that female sexuality is as animalistic – if not more so – than male. ‘We’d rather cast half the population, the female half, as a kind of stabilising force when it comes to sexuality,’ he explains. The idea that monogamy is more suited to women is no more than a ‘fairy tale’. Bergner claims another misnomer is that visual stimulus is not especially important for the average woman. Male escorts might satiate an impulse for variety and novelty in sexual partners – as important for women as for men. Despite cultural norms, female sexuality is not, for the most part, ‘sparked or sustained by emotional intimacy and safety’. ‘Track the level of desire in long-term relationships – not the level of love but the level of desire – and a different reality emerges, a reality that might lead to a male escort now and then.’

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  1. Thank you. As a male escort, part of my role is to help remove the stigma to non-clients and even to clients who have booked, paid and turned up to a hotel.
    I have quite a balance of clients between pure pleasure (fun fun fun) and nurturing/supporting/ empowering, but even the latter are after a good time. Bergner is correct, women are very animalistic in their sexuality; there’s just far greater cultural conditioning / suppression of their sexual desire from a very early age. “Don’t trust boys, they’re only after one thing,” “be a good girl,” and all the other stories we tell girls growing up. What we don’t say is that being sexually liberated and getting your own needs met is exactly what you need to do, so long as it doesn’t negatively impact on others.
    Great article. Thanks.

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