It seems like stories about parents behaving badly are all over the news lately. If they’re not taking bribes to convince their kids to attend a college which has a contract with a specific shoe company, they’re paying a “ringer” to take their kids’ tests for them. If they’re not freaking out beyond belief on the sidelines of a youth soccer game, they’re screaming their lungs out at parent-teacher meetings because their kid was given the poor grade she earned, rather than the good one they wanted her to receive.
One of these parents-behaving-badly stories caught Calico’s eye in particular – and it has nothing to do with education, sports, or even anyone young enough for their parents to still be concerned with their education or extracurricular activities. No, these parents did something far, far worse than bribing a college coach, or paying some nerd to take a test on behalf of their spoiled child.
What did these parents do and how has their adult child responded to their misdeeds? Find out in Calico’s latest post, “Parents: Thinking of Throwing Out Your Adult Son’s Porn Stash? I Hope He’s Not Litigious…”
by Calico Rudasill, Sssh.com Porn Movies For Women and Couples
When it comes to stories of parents behaving badly, there’s really no way to top the much-discussed “Operation Varsity Blues” case.
After all, no matter how shitty a little league mom or dad gets while freaking out on the sidelines of their child’s soccer game, it’s pretty unlikely the FBI will show up to march them off in handcuffs to face charges which could land them in jail for months – or maybe even for years.
Still, as an advocate for (and more-than-occasional consumer of) adult entertainment products, the parents-behaving-badly story in the news right now that caught my eye even more than the Varsity Blues case is one that law enforcement didn’t even deem worthy of investigation.
I’m speaking, of course, of the tragic tale of a Michigan man, identified only as “Charlie,” whose parents allegedly destroyed his extensive porn collection.
Your Honor, the Accused Show No Remorse…
You’d think, once confronted with the estimated value of Charlie’s porn collection (which he pegs at over $28,000), his parents would at least express some regret over their crime. But noooo, as these eager smut-smashers demonstrated in emails which are now exhibits in Charlie’s lawsuit, not only do they not feel bad, they seem to believe they’ve done their son some sort of valuable service!
“We counted twelve moving boxes full of pornography plus two boxes of ‘sex toys’ as you call them,” Charlie’s father wrote in one of the emails. “We began that day the process of destroying them and it took quite a while to do so… I did you a big favor by getting rid of all this stuff for you.”
You monster!!
You did Charlie a “big favor”? What’s next – the big favor of tossing his stamp collection into Lake Michigan? The ‘solid’ of melting down his meticulously curated archive of original Star Wars action figures and turning them into something more practical, like a big, multicolored paperweight?
There are “Big” Porn Collections – and Then There’s Charlie’s Porn Collection
Look, we’re not talking about a thumb drive with a couple hundred easily-replaced digital files on it here. We’re talking about over 1600 DVDs, 400+ VHS tapes (which, to me, underlines how far back Charlie started assembling this collection), more than 160 CDs and 70 sex toys.
The Ottawa County Sheriff’s Office says prosecutors declined to issue a warrant in the case, due to a lack of evidence. Well, of course there’s no evidence – his parents destroyed it all!
Where I come from, that email Charlie’s father wrote isn’t just evidence, it’s a confession. How much clearer could his dad be about what went down? “We began that day the process of destroying them and it took quite a while to do so.” Case closed!
See You in Court, Dad!
Obviously, Charlie didn’t relent in his pursuit of justice just because the police and prosecutors declined to be a part of it. And he’s not just asking the court to grant damages based on the original or replacement value of his porn and sex toys; he’s asking for treble damages of the stuff’s estimated value, a figure which comes out to over $85,000.
Since his parents obviously aren’t taking Charlie’s anguish seriously, I don’t suspect they’ll take the lawsuit very seriously either – not until or unless a judge decides it has enough merit to proceed, at least.
In explaining his decision to destroy Charlie’s prodigious pile of prurient product, in another email that’s part of the case, his father again suggested that it was for Charlie’s own good that he undertook the annihilate the archive.
“Believe it or not, one reason why I destroyed your porn was for your own mental and emotional health,” Charlie’s unrepentant father wrote. “I would have done the same if I had found a kilo of crack cocaine. Someday, I hope you will understand.”
You hope he’ll understand what, exactly? You’re the one suggesting a porn collection is akin to a kilo of crack cocaine, and Charlie is the one who’s confused?
For the record, if I found a kilo of crack cocaine among my (hypothetical-only) adult son’s belongings, I wouldn’t destroy it. I’d ask him where the fuck he managed to come up with the money for a kilo of crack cocaine while living under my roof – and then raise the shit out of his rent.
Only time (and a judge) will tell what becomes of Charlie’s lawsuit. Here’s hoping he finds the justice he seeks – and rents a storage locker for his porn once he’s reassembled his collection, rather than leave it in the hands of untrustworthy smut-stewards.