Taking the Blue out of The Blue Angels

by Coleen Singer at Sssh.com. 

If you are in the United States or Canada, you’re probably familiar with the elite US Navy jet squad, The Blue Angels, that make frequent appearances at air shows and events to demonstrate their pretty-darned-cool group flying routines.  And, you might have caught a news story about them that surfaced last year that the pilots and squad leaders were being naughty boys and girls.

Read on…

Today, the Navy released its report and recommendations about this scandalous event!  According to CNN,

One of the nation’s most prestigious teams of flying acrobats dive-bombed into the depths of sexual harassment and stayed there for at least a year, a new Navy study says. Under the command of Capt. Gregory McWherter, members of the Blue Angels openly passed around pornography and flew with it in their cockpits during airshows. … The 63-page document reads like a cross between the burlesque B movies “Hot Shot” and “Animal House,” as it describes how the squad’s Ready Room took on the atmosphere of a college fraternity.

Can you even imagine that?  Young healthy Navy pilots putting pinups in the cockpit and their lockers?  Oh the HORROR! Of equal, or even greater horror is why a Rear Admiral would pen a 63 page report about his findings and recommendations.  Is he getting paid by the word?  Your tax dollars at work again…

Come on.  It’s not like these guys were watching “Bukkake Butt Blasters #27” on the big plasma TV in the “Ready Room (is that the officer’s lounge?).  The tradition of soldiers, pilots and sailors keeping a few naughty pinups on hand has been a morale boosting tradition since World War I where it gave birth to the “Naughty French Post Cards” (which lead the way for erotic photography and porn that lead to entire genres of girlie pics in the 20th century).  There’s even a pretty neat charitable organization called Pinups For Patriots that carries on the pinup tradition from WWII forward. (Yes, their calendars are very PG-rated, but you get the idea.)

Mo Boyington, commercial pilot, warbird restorer enthusiast and managing editor of warbirdsnews and Sales Director at Fuckbook.com chimes in with this unique perspective, saying, “I think this shows the puritanism that still very persistent in America.  I don’t think this is about fighter pilots or the military, it’s about how society is very much hypocritical. Besides, Pin-Up girls have been around since the 1890s and became most popular in the 1940s. Some of the Pin-up girls painted in WWII airplanes were very very spicy“. Mo adds,  “Pilots holding the “stick” between their legs to fly definitely need a relief once in a while.”

But wait! There’s More!
At some point during this scandalous period at the Blue Angels, an oversized penis painted in the blue and gold colors of the Blue Angels adorned the roof of one of their airplane hangars. The image was so large that it could be seen FROM OUTER SPACE by satellites and appeared on Google Maps images. Since all of this climaxed (pun intended), a member of the squadron painted over the graffiti, and the satellite map image has since disappeared.

Granted, painting a big penis on the roof of your jet fighter plane hangar to indicate how big your dick is reminds me a bit of high school boys “toilet papering” suburban houses, but as the Navy hangar is in a no-fly zone for commercial aircraft, the only thing that could see it was Google Maps and the POTUS when flying in for a friendly visit? Much ado about nothing department…..

The final frenzy appears to be the Blue Angels posting up naughty photos and dirty jokes on groupme.com, a service they were supposed to be using for group scheduling and such.  But, let’s face it:  if there is an online group service, somebody is going to post up some naughty pics on it.  The internet, after all, IS for porn.

My humble opinion is that this entire imbroglio is simply another example of politically correct mission creep. Internet providers, local legislative bodies and even the US Dept of Defense throw a bone…

However, I do think it’s probably a good thing if the President of the United States gets an occasional stress relieving blowjob (he does, you know, have the big red button that can blow up the planet), and our men and women in uniform really should have the option to have some naughty visual fare for similar “masturbatorial assist”  reasons.  Just keep it out of site from anyone that might be offended and, for God’s sake, don’t slap a yeoman on the ass!