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Top 6 Reasons Why Guys Hate Missionary

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Top 6 Reasons Why Guys Hate Missionary

If you want to see why people like missionary sex, please visit a dating for seniors page. This page is going to lay out all those reasons why most guys would rather go shopping with you than sleep with you missionary style! And you know how guys prefer shopping over sex, right?! Missionary is not only lazy on her part, but it’s so uncreative that no self-respecting man or woman would ever waste time on it.

Reason #1: What’s There To See?

Guys are visual creatures, and in addition to physical pleasure, their viewing pleasure is also at the top of the list when it comes to the reasons for getting down and dirty in the bedroom. Not that he doesn’t like to look at your pretty face, but that could just as easily be accomplished over dinner, no? Sex is particularly about being naked with you, and the fact that during missionary there isn’t much to see almost defeats the purpose.

Reason #2: He Has To Do All The Work

Missionary isn’t fair because the girl can just lay there, while the guy has to do all the work. What if he just woke up and wants to have lazy morning sex? He’s the one who has to do all the thrusting while trying to figure out for the millionth time what to do with his arms!

Reason #3: Missionary Is Just For Skinny People

Missionary can be very tricky if you’re such a good cook that your partner’s shape is quickly becoming, well, round. His mid-section might get in the way, and he could end up crushing you and sweating all over you. As exaggerated as this may seem, missionary might make him feel self-conscious or all this could actually happen!

Reason #4: He Can’t Relax His Face

The best sex positions are those in which you can just relax without a care in the world. Missionary is not one of those positions because he has to do something with his face, such as keep kissing you or bury his face in your neck. There is too much pressure to make it romantic and not enough room to make it mind-blowing.

Reason #5: He Might Lose His Hearing

This is only a possibility with a girl who hasn’t had sex for so long even missionary does it for her. She could scream into the guy’s ear so loudly and burst his eardrums. It’s great that she’s enjoying herself and all, but there are other positions to do it where nobody gets tinnitus!

Reason #6: Girls Hate It Too

Take it from a girl, the only point of missionary is to lose your virginity. So, unless you’re a virgin there is absolutely no reason to have missionary sex! It’s lazy and unimaginative. It’s the kind of sex your parents or grandparents have! Why waste precious time on a position that does nothing for you when you can reach for the stars and have the time of your life!

 

Ashley Rosemont

Ashley Rosemont is a feature columnist for Sssh.com, the web’s original porn site for women by women. She is a Renaissance woman of many talents, but tries to remain humble in the face of all the curveballs life throws her way. She has been a professional writer for over two decades, and specializes in writing on media, culture, health and sexuality.
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Ashley Rosemont

Written by Ashley Rosemont

Ashley Rosemont is a feature columnist for Sssh.com, the web’s original porn site for women by women. She is a Renaissance woman of many talents, but tries to remain humble in the face of all the curveballs life throws her way. She has been a professional writer for over two decades, and specializes in writing on media, culture, health and sexuality.

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